Rhodes Boysons

A sketch from A Bit of Fry & Laurie

Caption "The Rhodes Boysons Hour" Stephen and Hugh are both dressed and made-up to look like Rhodes Boyson the popular and absurd Conservative member of parliament.

Stephen Hello there, I am Rhodes Boyson.

Hugh Good evening. My name is Rhodes Boyson.

Stephen We are the Rhodes Boysons. And this is our hour.

Hugh This is very much our hour. An hour in which phrases ...

Stephen Certainly phrases ... phrases yes, certainly.

Hugh Phrases like "centres of excellence" will be much in evidence.

Stephen You will find, in this our hour, that phrases comparable to, congruent with and exigent under, "centres of excellence" will be, to some extent, utilised.

Hugh And by a centre of excellence we mean ...

Stephen We mean, primarily ...

Hugh Primarily that is ...

Stephen A centre that is ...

Hugh By and large.

Stephen By-ly and large-ly.

Hugh Excellent. In some regard.

Stephen In some regard or other.

Hugh In some, or other, regard.

Stephen That is what we mean when we say "centre of excellence". I hope that's cleared that one up.

Hugh Absolutely. Another phrase meaning "centre of excellence" might be "school that is quite good".

Stephen That is substantially correct in essence. A centre of excellence is a school that is quite good. But the phrase "school that is quite good" doesn't sound nearly as ...

Hugh Ludicrous?

Stephen Nearly as ...

Hugh Pompous?

Stephen The phrase "school that is quite good" doesn't sound as ludicrous or pompous as the phrase "centre of excellence".

Hugh And for that reason ...

Stephen And that reason alone.

Hugh We will be using the phrase "centre of excellence" throughout our hour.

Stephen Our hour.

Hugh Another word that can't be stressed enough is "standards".

Stephen Standards as in "standards of excellence", moral standards, standards of accountability.

Hugh I like that one. Standards of accountability.

Stephen Rolls off the tongue, doesn't it? Standards of accountability.

Hugh So for the time being, we'll leave you with those two. "Centres of excellence".

Stephen That's centres of excellence.

Hugh And "Standards of accountability".

Stephen Standards of accountability. Ooh, I do like that one. I shall be using that in bed tonight. Standards of accountability. Lovely.

Hugh Really quite lovely.

Stephen Perfectly lovely.

Hugh So until the next time, it's goodbye from Rhodes Boyson.

Stephen And it's goodbye from Rhodes Boyson.

Hugh Goodbye.

Vox Pop

Stephen (As woman) If you lick the top bit, very slowly, you get arrested.

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