A Bit of Fry & Laurie

Red and Shiny

In the street, Stephen addresses the camera.

Stephen It's red, it's shiny, it's instantly desirable and it's remarkably cheap. One drawback. It doesn't exist yet. We wondered why not. Douglas Hurd has been foreign secretary for a record five years. If anyone knows it'll be Gordon Wade of Market Soundings plc. Hugh is there as Gordon. Gordon. It's red, it's shiny - everyone wants one, it needn't cost a fortune and it isn't tested on animals. Yet it doesn't exist. What's going on?

Hugh I don't know. We're very sorry. It should exist, I know that. Believe me we're working on it.

Stephen Have you thought of a name for it yet?

Hugh Not as of yet, no. The project has a working title ...

Stephen I've just got time to ask you, what is it?

Hugh The name at this moment is Mark Bannister.

Stephen Mark Bannister. Price?

Hugh We're hoping it'll be round about three pounds fifty, but it may go as high as ninety thousand.

Stephen Ninety thousand?

Hugh Rather depends on what it does, you see. And how much it costs to make it. But these are details ...

Stephen Exactly. The basic message is, you're going ahead, and we might expect to see Mark Bannisters in our shops soon? Fair answer.

Download Red and Shiny as XML